still new to all of this

So i have been looking at friends blogs lately, and decided maybe this is the way to get things off of my chest rather than making the people around me insane with all of my stupid thoughts. I have a tendancy to look at all of the bad things that may insue from a situation, and then in turn perhaps make those things happen instead of avoid them. I'm really not sure where to begin, so i suppose i will just jump right in.

lately i think I am possibly making things worse in my relationship. I say and do stupid things because i think stupid things. i wish there was some way to repress the thoughts that fill my head. i am way too overly emotional, and I allow things to hurt my feelings when i know darn well they were not said in that way. (i have a lot of spare time in my job as well, so instead of working, i try to find other ways to kill time, as you can tell.)

so here is my problem as of right now, and this may lead to more as i write, can't guarentee it won't, so i make no promises. Will is the most wonderful person that I could possibly have in my life. sometimes i'm afraid that he is too good for me. ok, strike that, i am very afraid that he is too good for me. he is intellegent, enough that my 152 IQ means just about diddly squat when we actually have debates (which btw, i love that we sit there and have debates.) I have this constant fear that he's gonna realize that he has sunken below his level with me, and will one day wake up and realize this mistake, and break up with me. now mind you he has done nothing to provoke these thoughts. it is 100% my mind working against me. he has gone out of his way to show me that i am loved. I have a 6 yr old daughter, Makenzie, (who is the cutest little one in the world i might add) and he is so great with her. we go out, and she is included. I had a mandotory parent night for girlscouts, and Will came with me. her open house, Will came with me. he thinks of her, and things that she would like to do, like going to see the nutcracker at xmas time (she's a little balerina, so she'll really love it.)

So back to the problem at hand (I could go on listing all of his good traits forever.) I have no idea how to qualm these feeling of ineptitude, and i'm afraid that maybe i am sabatageing (no clue how to spell that, sry) my relationship because of my feeling of inadiquicy. So i am open to any and all thoughts on the subject, and hoping that just by letting all of this out it will magically make me feel better.