So i've noticed that I really don't wanna do anything anymore. I have no interest in my job. It's becoming such a pain in the ass. So i've taken over the salary payrolls from another girl that used to run them. The director of HR thought it would be a better idea to have one person doing all of the payrolls. which makes perfect sense. and because i do such a good job with the other 2 payrolls I run, they decided to give me the other 2. so back when this all started I was all excited cause it meant that they trusted me with salary information, which has always been very hush hush, plus i like doing payrolls so i thought it would be good.
So then it comes time for the girl who already does salary payrolls to hand off the job to me. She turns into a total bitch about it. Won't show me everything i need to know, won't teach me, and just being mean as I ask questions. for example, she tells me to sit at her desk and run these 4 reports and take care of that. So i'm like, ok, well are you gonna show me what reports you're talking about? Are you gonna tell me where these figures come from? I mean how is that teaching? Then she tells earlene that she doesn't think i'm gonna be able to handle this job, and that I don't ask enough questions. Bull shit! I had to ask questions cause she wasn't offering any of the information up! Earlene says that it's because when she learned the payroll she didn't have a clue, but I've been running payrolls for 5 years, i kind of know what i'm doing. Then her and some other girl at work were talking about me at lunch with Earlene there and they were talking about how i'm not gonna know anything and I'm gonna have to talk to earlene about all these things that nicole never mentioned that i had to do. So earlene says nicole is trying to set me up for failure. WTF?!
I've never been anything but nice to this girl. I help her run reports that she doesn't know how to do, I've tried to help in any way i can. Earlene says she's just pissy cause i'm taking her payrolls and stepping on her toes, but what am I supposed to do when the president of the company tells me to do something? It just is really getting to me. I hate people being mean to me when i give them no reason to be.
Apparently I don't have enough to worry about already in my life, I need this chick trying to make me look bad at work. I just don't even wanna be here anymore, and reasons like this, I'm glad that we're trying to work it out that I quit my job and stay at home with the baby. She can have her friggin payrolls back. I just wish we knew for sure that we can afford it, and I'd tell her today to just not give them to me at all.
With everything else going on, I have really begun to hate my job, and if it weren't for the fact that i'm trying to pay off all my debt before the baby (including my car) then I think I would walk out.
Friday, June 13, 2008
Tuesday, June 3, 2008
changes
before you read this, realize this is not public knowledge yet, so please keep this info here.
well, so I haven't updated in forever, and a million things are going on in my life. Will and I went to Vegas, and had a blast! everyhting was picture perfect. we went to all the casinos, and when we got bored of the strip, we went to hoover dam and the grand canyon. it was amazing! and on top of all that, he proposed! It was incredibly romantic! we were walking the strip, and we went to see the fountains at the balagio. there was beautiful italian opera going, and the fountians were beautiful. then when the show was over, he got down on one knee, held out the ring, and told me it was the ring his dad gave to his mom, and it's the ring he wants to give me to ask me to be his wife. it was so beautiful.
So we decide to get married in june of next year. we were gonna do it in his back yard. then my ma suggests we do it at the elks, and gets me a good deal. so then we change it to January, since we wouldn't have to wait for nice weather. so we start making the plans, and it's looking like it would cost maybe 4 thousand, which is a really good deal for everything. so we start looking into everything and planning and whatnot.
well, now let's change everything again...i'm pregnant. I just found out this weekend. no more elegant wedding. my sister won't be able to make it with such short notice. my brother can't come. we have no money saved up. my ma still says we can have it at the elks, and she was gonna look into getting a price break. even slashing the guest list to only 50 (which is only family, no friends at all, which bugs me too!) it's still gonna cost at least $1500, and that's with my ma paying half. I mean i know i'm being selfish. i know that things are bothering me that really shouldn't. so what if i can't have the $600 dress i fell in love with, and instead i have to look for some discounted prom dress or something. so what if he is suggesting a costco sheet cake as our wedding cake. why should these things bother me when i am getting everything i wanted out of life.
I am marrying the man of my dreams, and we're starting our family together (a little earlier then planned, but still.) why should such trivial things be bothering me. i've been scouring my budget, trying to figure out what to do. we were talking about trying to have me stay home when the baby comes. it actually looks like it may be a possibility. i can pay off everything i owe, except my car by the time the baby comes. and even my car would be paid off after just 5 months. that's totally do-able. by that point, with my phone and car insurance and everything I'll only be adding $92 to the monthly bills. that's not bad at all. I have to go through his budget now, and figure out if we really can handle the loss of an income.
it just seems to me like i have all this good news, and i'm so upset. Will is being great. he's very excited about the baby, and he's being great helping me plan the wedding. he's being more supportive than i think anyone possibly could be, but i'm just still in this funk. I just can't seem to grasp on to the good, and all the worry is looming over me. no beautiful wedding, it's like we're teenagers that got knocked up. this isn't about our love anymore, it's about getting married as soon as possible before the baby.
i just don't know what to do, or how to make myself be more happy about losing the wedding of my dreams. see...i told you i'm being selfish, i mean i hear myself and get so pissed because i sound like a spoiled brat. I just can't help the way i feel.
well, so I haven't updated in forever, and a million things are going on in my life. Will and I went to Vegas, and had a blast! everyhting was picture perfect. we went to all the casinos, and when we got bored of the strip, we went to hoover dam and the grand canyon. it was amazing! and on top of all that, he proposed! It was incredibly romantic! we were walking the strip, and we went to see the fountains at the balagio. there was beautiful italian opera going, and the fountians were beautiful. then when the show was over, he got down on one knee, held out the ring, and told me it was the ring his dad gave to his mom, and it's the ring he wants to give me to ask me to be his wife. it was so beautiful.
So we decide to get married in june of next year. we were gonna do it in his back yard. then my ma suggests we do it at the elks, and gets me a good deal. so then we change it to January, since we wouldn't have to wait for nice weather. so we start making the plans, and it's looking like it would cost maybe 4 thousand, which is a really good deal for everything. so we start looking into everything and planning and whatnot.
well, now let's change everything again...i'm pregnant. I just found out this weekend. no more elegant wedding. my sister won't be able to make it with such short notice. my brother can't come. we have no money saved up. my ma still says we can have it at the elks, and she was gonna look into getting a price break. even slashing the guest list to only 50 (which is only family, no friends at all, which bugs me too!) it's still gonna cost at least $1500, and that's with my ma paying half. I mean i know i'm being selfish. i know that things are bothering me that really shouldn't. so what if i can't have the $600 dress i fell in love with, and instead i have to look for some discounted prom dress or something. so what if he is suggesting a costco sheet cake as our wedding cake. why should these things bother me when i am getting everything i wanted out of life.
I am marrying the man of my dreams, and we're starting our family together (a little earlier then planned, but still.) why should such trivial things be bothering me. i've been scouring my budget, trying to figure out what to do. we were talking about trying to have me stay home when the baby comes. it actually looks like it may be a possibility. i can pay off everything i owe, except my car by the time the baby comes. and even my car would be paid off after just 5 months. that's totally do-able. by that point, with my phone and car insurance and everything I'll only be adding $92 to the monthly bills. that's not bad at all. I have to go through his budget now, and figure out if we really can handle the loss of an income.
it just seems to me like i have all this good news, and i'm so upset. Will is being great. he's very excited about the baby, and he's being great helping me plan the wedding. he's being more supportive than i think anyone possibly could be, but i'm just still in this funk. I just can't seem to grasp on to the good, and all the worry is looming over me. no beautiful wedding, it's like we're teenagers that got knocked up. this isn't about our love anymore, it's about getting married as soon as possible before the baby.
i just don't know what to do, or how to make myself be more happy about losing the wedding of my dreams. see...i told you i'm being selfish, i mean i hear myself and get so pissed because i sound like a spoiled brat. I just can't help the way i feel.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
I talked to Brian
So Brian calls me after work last night. (my work, he still doesn't work) I told him I got that phone call, and they say we owe 3 grand. He said he knows, he's been getting the letters for a year. i asked why he didn't tell me about it, and that I hadn't been receiving the letters. He said he just figured they were sending them to me too. OK, I can understand that logic. except I wouldn't have ignored it! So I told him I was applying for a loan from my bank for the money, so that I can pay it and keep it from messing up both of our credits. I told him I was willing to work with him, and asked him if he was willing to work with me in any way shape or form. He told me that he wasn't going to make any promises that he wouldn't be able to keep. I again asked if he was willing to work with me at all? he said he can't promise anything. WTF? he said that he didn't even think the apartment was his responsibility anyway, cause he didn't want it in the first place, he just went along with it. OK, whatever! he signed the lease too! and the reason we had to get an apartment was because he couldn't get along with my mother, and we were living in her house. He finally said he would look at crunching some numbers and see what he could do.
He then proceeded to tell me that it was really hard for him to get over me, and how hard it is for him to find a job, and he's been looking so hard. poor him. I'm sorry, but I really don't believe that it takes over 2 years to find a job. McDonald's is always hiring, and you can get a crappy job and still continue to look for a better one.
He told me to msg him when i find out about the loan, and he would look into seeing what he can do about helping me out, but no promises.
it was really a terribly crappy conversation, and it reminded me what a terrible relationship i had with him, and how he hasn't changed a bit. He can still go out every night and drink and do drugs, and everything, but he can't tell me he'll give me $50 a month to take care of this. he's just as immature and irresponsible as always. He has no bills whatsoever, and he works wrestling gigs. you could mistake him for a 12 yr old little boy.
By the time I got off the phone with him, I got over to wills house, and I was upset, because it was a very unproductive phone call. i was telling will about it, and he just told me "well what did you expect?" after a couple minutes, he asked if i was gonna be crabby all night. at that point i told him that he has no comforting skills. i then told him numerous things that he has said that he should not say when trying to comfort me. like it's all my fault, are you gonna be crabby all night, your being irrational, etc. we talked a bit about how he isn't a real emotional person, and when he sees a problem he goes about trying to fix it, and not dwell on the emotional factors. uhg. well me being as emotional as i am, i asked him to maybe work on the comfort thing a little. he did tell me that no matter what the problem we can work on fixing it together, and that was pretty sweet of him. i stopped being so crabby and the rest of the night was pretty good.
I just msgd Brian and told him that i did get approved for the loan, and asked if he's figured anything out. i won't hold my breath. Everyone is telling me to just take him to small claims court. i just don't know. I'm kind of leaning towards it after my phone call with him. i mean Will says that if i do that, and he doesn't pay (which is likely) the courts can't make him pay. I mean he has no job, and no bank account anyway. but I can write like 30% off towards bad debt on my taxes next year, but only if i sue. i guess I'm still not sure if its worth it at this point. 30% of half of the $2200 i can get them talked down to by making a lump sum is only $330. then take out court costs and stuff from that, and I'll maybe write off $250. is it really worth it to take time off work I don't have to maybe write off that small amount?
what do you think?
He then proceeded to tell me that it was really hard for him to get over me, and how hard it is for him to find a job, and he's been looking so hard. poor him. I'm sorry, but I really don't believe that it takes over 2 years to find a job. McDonald's is always hiring, and you can get a crappy job and still continue to look for a better one.
He told me to msg him when i find out about the loan, and he would look into seeing what he can do about helping me out, but no promises.
it was really a terribly crappy conversation, and it reminded me what a terrible relationship i had with him, and how he hasn't changed a bit. He can still go out every night and drink and do drugs, and everything, but he can't tell me he'll give me $50 a month to take care of this. he's just as immature and irresponsible as always. He has no bills whatsoever, and he works wrestling gigs. you could mistake him for a 12 yr old little boy.
By the time I got off the phone with him, I got over to wills house, and I was upset, because it was a very unproductive phone call. i was telling will about it, and he just told me "well what did you expect?" after a couple minutes, he asked if i was gonna be crabby all night. at that point i told him that he has no comforting skills. i then told him numerous things that he has said that he should not say when trying to comfort me. like it's all my fault, are you gonna be crabby all night, your being irrational, etc. we talked a bit about how he isn't a real emotional person, and when he sees a problem he goes about trying to fix it, and not dwell on the emotional factors. uhg. well me being as emotional as i am, i asked him to maybe work on the comfort thing a little. he did tell me that no matter what the problem we can work on fixing it together, and that was pretty sweet of him. i stopped being so crabby and the rest of the night was pretty good.
I just msgd Brian and told him that i did get approved for the loan, and asked if he's figured anything out. i won't hold my breath. Everyone is telling me to just take him to small claims court. i just don't know. I'm kind of leaning towards it after my phone call with him. i mean Will says that if i do that, and he doesn't pay (which is likely) the courts can't make him pay. I mean he has no job, and no bank account anyway. but I can write like 30% off towards bad debt on my taxes next year, but only if i sue. i guess I'm still not sure if its worth it at this point. 30% of half of the $2200 i can get them talked down to by making a lump sum is only $330. then take out court costs and stuff from that, and I'll maybe write off $250. is it really worth it to take time off work I don't have to maybe write off that small amount?
what do you think?
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
Roadblocks SUCK!
OK, so yet another reason to think that exes suck hardcore. So i get a call a couple days ago saying that I am being put into collections for a $3000.00 bill from the apartment that Brian and I shared. And by sharing I mean that he promised to pay half, and didn't ever pay a cent the whole time we lived together. so the guy tells me that they have been sending notices for the last year and have received no response. gee, maybe that's because all the notices were going to Brian's house, and I knew nothing about it! so now i have to come up with 3 grand, and Brian continues to get off Scott free. gotta love the fairness there. so i was talking to will shortly after i got the call, and he tells me well you signed the lease, so you're responsible for the payment, and you should have known this was coming, and all kinds of other "logical" things. OK, I'm sorry, but if you got a phone call saying you're going into collections for that much money, do you really want someone telling you it's all yr fault and you deserve it? um...no! so he tells me that i need to go to the bank right that moment and apply for a personal loan, and i tell him i don't want to cause I'm upset and i don't wanna break into tears out in public. is it just me or is that kind of insensitive? finally i cave in and go, and he comes with, which was good, cause i didn't know what kind of loan to get or anything, and he has some experience with that kind of thing. i told him that he was being insensitive though, and he said that he just looks at things logically. whatever.
so i actually got the loan, which was pretty damn great, so i can call the guy back and pay it off in full before it damages my credit. So i called Brian, cause i want to at least tell him he owes half, not that it will get me anything, he still doesn't have a job. and he's been getting these notices for a year and never said a friggin word to me, and that's beyond wrong. he could have dropped it off in my mailbox, or told nae to tell me, or called me. there were def options there. so i called him yesterday at 1230, and he was still asleep. i asked his gram to have him call me at 4. no call. i called again at 430, no answer. then this morning at like 6 he sends me a myspace msg. "you rang?-Brian"
um...ok, how about you call me at a decent hour? how about you tell me the best time to get ahold of you? how about acting like a human instead of a 12 yr old little boy? uhg!
so i responded and told him i need to talk to him, and asked him to tell me the best time to get ahold of him. I don't even know what to say to him. I'm so pissed. and I've been trying so hard to get my finances in order and everything, and everything I've done is now undone. it's just not fair.
the guy at the debt collectors said i should sue him. he also told me that he would give me all the information to do so. but idk. i mean he doesn't have a job, so even if i did sue him, it wouldn't be him paying, it would be his ma or grandparents. and they are REALLY good people. and will says that even if you sue someone, and the judge rules in my favor, it would still be up to me to collect. so if he didn't wanna pay, then basically he wouldn't even have to. what kind of sense does that make?!
i just really don't know what to say to him when i finally do talk to him, and i don't know what to do about the whole situation.
any suggestions?
so i actually got the loan, which was pretty damn great, so i can call the guy back and pay it off in full before it damages my credit. So i called Brian, cause i want to at least tell him he owes half, not that it will get me anything, he still doesn't have a job. and he's been getting these notices for a year and never said a friggin word to me, and that's beyond wrong. he could have dropped it off in my mailbox, or told nae to tell me, or called me. there were def options there. so i called him yesterday at 1230, and he was still asleep. i asked his gram to have him call me at 4. no call. i called again at 430, no answer. then this morning at like 6 he sends me a myspace msg. "you rang?-Brian"
um...ok, how about you call me at a decent hour? how about you tell me the best time to get ahold of you? how about acting like a human instead of a 12 yr old little boy? uhg!
so i responded and told him i need to talk to him, and asked him to tell me the best time to get ahold of him. I don't even know what to say to him. I'm so pissed. and I've been trying so hard to get my finances in order and everything, and everything I've done is now undone. it's just not fair.
the guy at the debt collectors said i should sue him. he also told me that he would give me all the information to do so. but idk. i mean he doesn't have a job, so even if i did sue him, it wouldn't be him paying, it would be his ma or grandparents. and they are REALLY good people. and will says that even if you sue someone, and the judge rules in my favor, it would still be up to me to collect. so if he didn't wanna pay, then basically he wouldn't even have to. what kind of sense does that make?!
i just really don't know what to say to him when i finally do talk to him, and i don't know what to do about the whole situation.
any suggestions?
Monday, March 17, 2008
I'm being a little pushy, I know
So I gave Will his watch, and he liked it. Not quite the wow factor that I was hoping for, but he's not a really excitable person. So Friday we went to dinner with ma, Mak, Will, JR, Brenda, and Yoshi. It was very nice. Then Saturday, i finished up a project for ma that she needed my help on, then makie and I went over to Wills. I took him out to Buka di Beppo's for his bday dinner. we went back to his house, played a few games of this new board game makie got for her bday, pictureeka. it was pretty fun, we all enjoyed it. then we rented a movie, evan almighty. we went to bed. then on sunday, we went up to wills gram's house and visited with her and his aunt. in the car on the way back i was looking at vegas brochures, and read an artical that said in vegas to get married all you need is a valid drivers license, and $55 to get a marriage license. he said maybe if it was a year later he would think about it, but not now. back to his house, and we ended up spending the night again.
this morning i woke up at like 330, and decided that he should wake up too! so after waking him up in a very nice way, we were laying there talking while i was waiting for my alarm to go off. he was talking about how things would work out "theoretically" if we were to get married. about taking makie to school in the morning, and it being such a drive and all. what an inconvenience, and if we would really get any more time together, and what would my mother think, and if she would bitch about getting less time with me, and finances, and the moeny it would take to get a ring, and then pay for a wedding. he said that it isn't that he's not sure about me, it's all the other factors that go along with me. he said he's 90% certain that he wants to marry me. but is that really enough? i told him i'm 150% sure, and he laughed and said that i guess that makes up for his 10% of doubts. I told him about when i was looking for his watch at zales, being a girl and all, I went and looked at the engagement rings, and told him about the one that i like, and told him it was on sale right now, lol. he said that's great, no pressure. but he was laughing about it. then he was saying that he might get the rings from when his mom and dad got married.
idk, i mean i lovve it when he talks about us getting married, and it's so very much what i want, but i really want him to want it too, and i don't know how to make him see what i see when i look at us together. i know that it's just gonna take more time, and i really should just leave it alone until he figures it out on his own. the thing is that i think if i left it alone, he would just let things continue this way for a million years. one of the things that is making him think about this on his own though is the fact that he's adamant that we're not gonna live together until we're married. well even he's getting sick of me not being around enough. every day he's complaining more and more about not spending enough time with me, and the funny thing is, the more time i spend with him, the more time i want to spend with him. every other relationship i've ever been in, after a while i just get sick of the guy. the more time i spend with Will though, the more I find myself wanting to spend even more time with him. I swear it's like nothing i've ever experienced. I just can't get enough of him.
Idk, i planted the seeds of though about getting married in vegas, so i guess i'll just have to wait and see what he wants to do. i know i need to be patient, and let him move at his own pace. I'm just so ready, ya know. it's so hard for me to just sit back and let things progress at a snails pace. oh well, things will work out. with a relationship like ours, it's stronger than anything i've ever known. i just hope it's stronger than my impatience, lol.
well, i'm gonna get started on work, hope you all have a good one!
this morning i woke up at like 330, and decided that he should wake up too! so after waking him up in a very nice way, we were laying there talking while i was waiting for my alarm to go off. he was talking about how things would work out "theoretically" if we were to get married. about taking makie to school in the morning, and it being such a drive and all. what an inconvenience, and if we would really get any more time together, and what would my mother think, and if she would bitch about getting less time with me, and finances, and the moeny it would take to get a ring, and then pay for a wedding. he said that it isn't that he's not sure about me, it's all the other factors that go along with me. he said he's 90% certain that he wants to marry me. but is that really enough? i told him i'm 150% sure, and he laughed and said that i guess that makes up for his 10% of doubts. I told him about when i was looking for his watch at zales, being a girl and all, I went and looked at the engagement rings, and told him about the one that i like, and told him it was on sale right now, lol. he said that's great, no pressure. but he was laughing about it. then he was saying that he might get the rings from when his mom and dad got married.
idk, i mean i lovve it when he talks about us getting married, and it's so very much what i want, but i really want him to want it too, and i don't know how to make him see what i see when i look at us together. i know that it's just gonna take more time, and i really should just leave it alone until he figures it out on his own. the thing is that i think if i left it alone, he would just let things continue this way for a million years. one of the things that is making him think about this on his own though is the fact that he's adamant that we're not gonna live together until we're married. well even he's getting sick of me not being around enough. every day he's complaining more and more about not spending enough time with me, and the funny thing is, the more time i spend with him, the more time i want to spend with him. every other relationship i've ever been in, after a while i just get sick of the guy. the more time i spend with Will though, the more I find myself wanting to spend even more time with him. I swear it's like nothing i've ever experienced. I just can't get enough of him.
Idk, i planted the seeds of though about getting married in vegas, so i guess i'll just have to wait and see what he wants to do. i know i need to be patient, and let him move at his own pace. I'm just so ready, ya know. it's so hard for me to just sit back and let things progress at a snails pace. oh well, things will work out. with a relationship like ours, it's stronger than anything i've ever known. i just hope it's stronger than my impatience, lol.
well, i'm gonna get started on work, hope you all have a good one!
Thursday, March 13, 2008
wills upcoming bday, and my impatience
ok, so chuck is bugging me to blog again, so i will succumb. so wills bday is saturday, and i have been going insane trying to figure out what to do for him. so i finally decided i was gonna get him a nice watch. so i find the one i like at zales, and i bought it. it's a really nice watch, and i'm really hoping he's gonna like it, cause i'm kind of nervous about it not being exactly what he wants or something. i mean he basically has to tell me he likes it even if he doesn't. i spent a little more than i was going to. it was almost $250, but if it's the right gift, then that really doesn't matter. i just want him to be happy.
so all of that being said, i am a girl and all, so i went over to the engagement ring section. i have totally fallen in love with one of the rings i saw there. I looked at all the rings they had, and i've been looking at other rings at other stores. this is the one I want!!! ok, so forgive me, cause i have no idea how to put in links and stuff http://www.zales.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2538221&cp=2071133.2115463&pg=1&numResultsPerPage=47&cp=2071133&fbn=Metal+Color%7CWhite&f=PAD%2FMetal+Color%2FWhite&fbc=1&categoryId=2115463&kpc=1&parentPage=search&searchId=24535289193
but go look at this ring, it's just beautiful. and perfect for me. i don't like big and gawdy stuff, and this is the bridal set, which means that i wouldn't have to look for a matching wedding ring. and it's way cheap too, that wasn't my intention, but hey, woo hoo bonus for will, lol.
I know i'm getting carried away and all, but i really know that he's the one i wanna be with! i have no doubts. and if he wanted to get marrried when we went to vegas in May, i would be way more than willing.
grrrr, have i mentioned how much i hate having to be patient?
ok, i guess that's it. have a good one!!!
so all of that being said, i am a girl and all, so i went over to the engagement ring section. i have totally fallen in love with one of the rings i saw there. I looked at all the rings they had, and i've been looking at other rings at other stores. this is the one I want!!! ok, so forgive me, cause i have no idea how to put in links and stuff http://www.zales.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2538221&cp=2071133.2115463&pg=1&numResultsPerPage=47&cp=2071133&fbn=Metal+Color%7CWhite&f=PAD%2FMetal+Color%2FWhite&fbc=1&categoryId=2115463&kpc=1&parentPage=search&searchId=24535289193
but go look at this ring, it's just beautiful. and perfect for me. i don't like big and gawdy stuff, and this is the bridal set, which means that i wouldn't have to look for a matching wedding ring. and it's way cheap too, that wasn't my intention, but hey, woo hoo bonus for will, lol.
I know i'm getting carried away and all, but i really know that he's the one i wanna be with! i have no doubts. and if he wanted to get marrried when we went to vegas in May, i would be way more than willing.
grrrr, have i mentioned how much i hate having to be patient?
ok, i guess that's it. have a good one!!!
Friday, February 15, 2008
Valentine's Day
So I firmly believe that I have the greatest boyfriend ever. Last night, I get off work, go to Will's house, and had the best night. He had a bouquet of Tulips for me, because he knows that roses aren't my favorite. He didn't know what my favorite flower was, but he really tried. It was sweet. He was dressed so nice, and then I saw the card, and I almost cried. He's really not the type of guy that expresses his feelings much. Thats kind of hard for me, cause then I'm always trying to guess how he feels. Well, he pretty much spilled it on the card, and it just meant so much. I know you probably don't care, but this is what it said:
My love for you is more powerful than any words can describe. I adore you. I think of you every spare moment and wish we could spend every day together. I never met a person so perfect for me. I would do anything for you. For the first of "Hundreds" of Valentine's days. With all my heart, Will
Maybe because he isn't the gushy type, it just means a lot, ya know. then he took me out to Boca di Bepo (i think that was the name) anyway, it was this really kewl italian place, which was super sweet, cause italian is my favorite, but he's really not a big fan. then, he took me to the movies, where we saw a chick flick :-) It was a really good one too! "Definately, Maybe." Then back to his house, and I'll just say that the night ended perfectly as well.
I just can't say how happy he makes me. I've just never felt so happy/loved/comfortable/challenged/giddy, just overall like I am in the greatest relationship ever. I know that I go on and on about him, but I guess I am just in shock of what a great guy he is, and just how happy I am to hae him in my life. That's just not smething I'm used to. Relationsips in my past have always been complicated in some way or another. There has always been way more bad than good. This relationship has NO BAD! Sometimes I just get overwhelmed with it, lol. Is that crazy or what?
ok, so I guess I'll stop there, it's just that I love talking about how happy he makes me, but I'm sure all my friends are sick of hearing it, lol. Oh well. :-)
My love for you is more powerful than any words can describe. I adore you. I think of you every spare moment and wish we could spend every day together. I never met a person so perfect for me. I would do anything for you. For the first of "Hundreds" of Valentine's days. With all my heart, Will
Maybe because he isn't the gushy type, it just means a lot, ya know. then he took me out to Boca di Bepo (i think that was the name) anyway, it was this really kewl italian place, which was super sweet, cause italian is my favorite, but he's really not a big fan. then, he took me to the movies, where we saw a chick flick :-) It was a really good one too! "Definately, Maybe." Then back to his house, and I'll just say that the night ended perfectly as well.
I just can't say how happy he makes me. I've just never felt so happy/loved/comfortable/challenged/giddy, just overall like I am in the greatest relationship ever. I know that I go on and on about him, but I guess I am just in shock of what a great guy he is, and just how happy I am to hae him in my life. That's just not smething I'm used to. Relationsips in my past have always been complicated in some way or another. There has always been way more bad than good. This relationship has NO BAD! Sometimes I just get overwhelmed with it, lol. Is that crazy or what?
ok, so I guess I'll stop there, it's just that I love talking about how happy he makes me, but I'm sure all my friends are sick of hearing it, lol. Oh well. :-)
Thursday, January 24, 2008
question for you all
Ok, so I have a question. I'm really not sure what to do about something that happened last night. tell me what you guys would do.
Last night i was checking my email, and an ex pops up on my messenger and says hi. i say hi, we still chat sometimes. then he tells me he misses me, and he still loves me, and he wishes that he could still have me in his life. He knows all about Will. he says he's happy that I have him in my life, but that he regrets losing me. I tell him that I'm totally devoted to Will, and that what he's doing is inapporpriate, and that dredging up the past is pointless, because it's the past. the thing is, that he's friends with my mom, so there are times that I have to hang out with him and such. Will knows about my past with him, and he's uncomfortable about him to begin with, but he doesn't throw a fit or anything when I go to his house with ma (she doesn't wanna go alone, cause she's not very social, so she'll only go to his get togethers if I go with her.)
So the question is, do I tell Will about the conversation last night, or do I just let it go. I don't want him to feel like i'm hiding anything from him, but at the same time, i really don't see how telling him will make anything better either. grrrr. what do you think?
Last night i was checking my email, and an ex pops up on my messenger and says hi. i say hi, we still chat sometimes. then he tells me he misses me, and he still loves me, and he wishes that he could still have me in his life. He knows all about Will. he says he's happy that I have him in my life, but that he regrets losing me. I tell him that I'm totally devoted to Will, and that what he's doing is inapporpriate, and that dredging up the past is pointless, because it's the past. the thing is, that he's friends with my mom, so there are times that I have to hang out with him and such. Will knows about my past with him, and he's uncomfortable about him to begin with, but he doesn't throw a fit or anything when I go to his house with ma (she doesn't wanna go alone, cause she's not very social, so she'll only go to his get togethers if I go with her.)
So the question is, do I tell Will about the conversation last night, or do I just let it go. I don't want him to feel like i'm hiding anything from him, but at the same time, i really don't see how telling him will make anything better either. grrrr. what do you think?
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
So the year is off to a pretty good start. Things are still going great with Will, and i think i'm starting to calm down a little with the whole freaking out about everything that's going on in his head and trying to speed up the relationship process. The way i see it is that everything is perfect the way it is, so why mess with a good thing. Things are becoming normal with Seton in the house. It's gonna be a little difficult adjusting to anyone new moving in, but she's fitting right in to our home. I have a new boss here at work, well, actually my boss has a new boss. She's not really happy with that, and is kind of freaking out, and work has been WAY busy, but it makes the day go by.
So i've been working on getting my finances in order, and it's going really well. the way ii have it figured, i will be totally debt free (car excluded) by the end of march. That's not too bad considering i was in the hole $5000 in mid december. then i'll be able to pay more to my car and a savings account so my car will be paid off 2 years early, and i'll have a bunch of money banked for whatever comes next (house, wedding perhaps, lol.)
I guess that's all the new developments in the new year.
So i've been working on getting my finances in order, and it's going really well. the way ii have it figured, i will be totally debt free (car excluded) by the end of march. That's not too bad considering i was in the hole $5000 in mid december. then i'll be able to pay more to my car and a savings account so my car will be paid off 2 years early, and i'll have a bunch of money banked for whatever comes next (house, wedding perhaps, lol.)
I guess that's all the new developments in the new year.
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